Thursday, July 22

my God is the opposite of my shortcomings.

though i am weak, he is strong. though i am faithless, still he is faithful.

movies to see: despicable me and toy story 3. [what am i, 12??]
oh, and dead poet's society.

books to read: Through Painted Deserts - Donald Miller; Irresistible Revolution - Shane Claiborne; The Folley of Prayer - Matt Woodley

i'm doing a lot of driving out to frisco and prosper lately... i can FINALLY get my car for real inspected again tomorrow. all i can say is that it had better pass. max and i have had some arguments lately.
the online classes are going a little better; i've passed two more quizzes, so that might start moving along more smoothly. i hope so! it's going to be hard to keep up with all the traveling i'm doing starting next Tuesday! i'm sure the Bacon wedding is just going to be beautiful; they asked me to photograph the girls getting ready, which i'm cool with. just let me be clear: I DO NOT WANT TO BE A WEDDING PHOTOGRAPHER. oh, the stresses, the lighting, the brides, the unpredictable children... the pressure! i admire wedding photographers greatly, and i stinking LOVE their stuff, but becoming one is Not. my aspiration. maybe someday i'll be good enough and be comfortable enough with awesome enough gear to be cool with it, but as of now, it's not the plan. =]

i am still (always, forever) learning about faithfulness. it's amazing to me that i can take my cues from the example of my very creator in this area. now, here is a trustworthy saying: if we died with him, we will also live with him. if we endure, we will also reign with him. if we disown him, he will also disown us. if we are faithless, he will remain faithful, for he cannot disown himself. 2tim2.11_13
what a paradoxical portion of text. in each statement, the second half is the result - it is contingent on the first half. except for that last one.
no matter what, God is faithful. there is nothing we can do to change it. his faithfulness is contingent on nothing - it just IS.
that's the God i serve. that's the way i'm supposed to be.
but i'm left feeling a little like monica in "the one where ross hugs rachel" when she tells her roommate rachel that chandler is moving in and rachel has to move out. She's sad to tell rachel the bad news, but when rachel doesn't bat an eye at the news and handles it like a champ, monica feels a twinge of remorse.
"don't they feel the least bit sad?" i ask the empty space next to me, "i mean, it's the end of an era!" because it's obviously all about me.
i am just a selfish, faithless girl. Lord, transform me into a woman with a gentle and quiet spirit, one who trusts in You regardless of the responses of others, one who serves those surrounding her with no expectation of reciprocation.
come close, listen to the story about a love more faithful than the morning.
the Father gave His only Son just to save us.
that's what i'm talking about.

love from dallas,

Saturday, July 17

Donald Miller and Dr. Seuss.

some people are just innately profound. i like that.
i looked up some quotes from Dr. Seuess and from Donald Miller recently. The Dr. Seuss ones made me smile so much. the Donald Miller ones made me think again. you know, i'd love to be a reader. i like to read. i just always forget to pick up the books.
you know what i really like? things that are the same around the world. i mean, it's cool to know that people are just people, no matter where you find them. it's awesome to find that God is a faithful God; a God of the nations, whose praise rises from the whole earth to the heavens in one song - wow, what a beautiful song it will be when we're all truly unified. dogs chase cats in every country. Venus burns as brightly in the Middle East as it does here in my Texas culdesac. kids everywhere love stickers. it kind of connects us, you know?
somehow, a part of this summer has been the death of my constant search for love. sometimes i feel like i'm still beating it with the shoe-sole of my will when it twitches, but its main sentence came with my decision to pursue India. and who am i to think i need a man to find love?

love is affection, love is passion, love is a sense of constancy.
love is someone to serve, love is incandescent happiness, and love is a choice.

my Daddy puts his arm around me when i sit next to him in church.
it's all the affection i need.

excuse me while i gun it through the darkness on the fastest windiest road i can find and blast my music out my four open windows.
it's all the passion i need.

i make chai for my family every day, and they ask for more.
it's all the constancy i need.

my momma has way too much on her plate, and there are always dishes and laundry to be done.
she's all the someone to serve that i need.

a cow moo'd goodbye to me today as i got in my already-running parked car to leave him.
he gave me some of that incandescence. :)
i find love in a thousand different places, and i'm not ready to commit to being tied down to just one. why do i think i want something that i honestly, really, truly, just don't?
i've fallen in love with the life i lead, and it's gonna take a pretty DANG perfect man to coax me away from it and into his arms.
my being single is not a disease,
and from now on, my being single is no mistake. it's a choice.

so, in the words of Dr. Seuss, "sometimes the questions are complicated, and the answers are simple."
in the words of Donald Miller, "Love is both something that happens to you and something you decide upon."

i don't have to wait. i decide to acknowledge that love is happening to me now.
it's just that simple!
and that's how i feel today.

love from Dallas,
Julie. [moo.]

Friday, July 16

wealth and integrity


in India, things would happen every day that i would mentally tag, thinking, "I need to tell people about this."
in America, as i've mentioned, things are a little different. i lounge around. i take my car to the shop. i spend money i don't have. i'm not adventurous or proud of myself. i'm not pleased, refreshed, or delighted by my surroundings.
consequently, i have little to report.
but TODAY, it happened! that feeling, that hope, that excitement that means i have something to say.
Still not quite on American time, i hit the sack at 3 in the morning... and my eyes popped open a mere four and a half hours later at 7:34 AM. I decided just to get up and use the extra time i now have to get cracking on some work i have to do. I checked my CSP email to stay updated, and found that two more people who i don't even know want to sponsor Indian children who are so dear to my heart. I reflected on the people i've met, the churches i've had contact with, and the family members i've spoken with here who have such bighearted devotion to this God who transcends nationality. I started to realize that people who are overseas are not the only people who have hearts for the evangelization of the world...
and the chip on my shoulder started melting away.

this does not mean that my feelings have changed for India.

i am going back.

but it is helping me to understand and integrate my Stateside role, and i'm kind of loving it this morning. I love still being connected with PMI. I love what God's got me doing, who He's got me meeting, and the Truths He has me discovering. Oh, i must serve Him wherever i am.

Let love and faithfulness never leave you;
bind them around your neck,
write them on the tablet of your heart.
anywhere i go, may i remember love and faithfulness. may i always be the same Julie-Didi. THAT's integrity.

Honor the Lord with your wealth,
with the firstfruits of all your crops;
then your barns will be filled to overflowing,
and your vats will brim over with new wine.
here is something that Americans can do more than Indians can. my position at this point has put me in contact with Americans who are living this. this heart has been the redeeming point of America to me. this point has reminded me of love, and is winning me back.

Christian America, you're surprising me.
Keep it up.

Wednesday, July 14


Here in America, everything is different.
yes, thank you captain obvious.
but i mean, my desires, my thought patterns, my life drive - it's all different here. the struggles have shifted from sweating while walking, bucket washing, toaster oven cooking and keeping track of my padlock key to getting lost on the streets of the city, keeping updated with my cell phone calls and finding the best deal on a camera charger.
yesterday was a remarkable day.
i got up around 8 and began going over GRE strategy tips and practice questions - mostly math, since thats what i kept forgetting. i printed off my directions, took a shower, and headed out the door at 11:00 to drive my 21-minute route to my 12:00 test.
and i was late.
i was actually thinking about how nice it was to be able to drive my cute black car again when i realized there was a tricky portion of the directions, and it was really all downhill from there.
so, i was late to my GRE. the nice old lady calmed me down and assured me i could still take it, and i felt a little better. i was still uneasy because i had little time to prepare for the graduate-level test and i am still feeling jetlagged. my fears turned out to be well-founded, as my scores were well below what i would expect of myself.
whatever, i shook it off and went to buy a new phone charging cord to replace the one i left on a different continent, and took my car to fail its two months overdue inspection.
oh, life mundane.

there is one thing that is the same in both cultures that i've noticed...
there isn't a lot of escape from the noise.
whether it's traffic and bellowing vegetable vendors or ringing phones and chattering people, i find no silence.
i plug my ears with headphones. i put my pillow over my head.

but when i talk to God, silence is all i hear. How real He is, but how quiet.
"Father, how do i reconcile what i've seen with where i am? Father, how can i keep from becoming apathetic? Father, who have you given me to help today? Father, where am i meant to be?"

my open-ended questions trail off into the silence. the trust that was so recently so real to me is again a grasping at straws. I trust i have a reason to be here. I trust that if i follow Him, He will use me. I trust that my American life is purposed.

God of my details, God of all nations, God of the silence.
How good my God is.

Saturday, July 10

back to the land of feet and fahrenheit...

Muscle relaxers > caffeine. Woo, just slept away a whole 8-hour flight and still can’t wake up!

Well, here I am – just chilling in Amsterdam’s Schiphol airport once again. I think I’ll skip the crazypurpletinyspaceman “Yotel” experience this time around, if at all possible. J I wonder what Asheesh is up to!

Seeing the table where I sat for hours awaiting my hotel booking time and flight departure makes me wonder if it’s the same me that sits here, just a chair and a booth over, and just two months more mature.

I can say that in my opinion, they were two months well spent. Obviously I can never regain what time I have spent in my life, but I wouldn’t retract my exhausting, dusty, heartwrenching, trying time in India for anything.

But, back to my question. am I the same me? Well, friends, I know it doesn’t make much sense: I feel that I haven’t really become different, but I know I have been changed.

Same me. Same love. Same quirks. Same needs. Same struggles.

But I’ve been introduced to a whole slew of new options for the direction of my path in life. I’ve been opened up to receive a new perspective. I’ve been once again enlightened to, and honestly slapped in the face by, a world that is bigger than me and my tan and my bed and my boyfriend.

I’ve been set free to find satisfaction.

I’ve been given an opportunity to know how a confident, competent, courageous and caring woman would act.

Oh, I have indeed been changed.

What have I done in India, you may inquire, that has had such a profound effect on me?

Man, I’m so glad you asked.

· - First of all, I cultivated a strength for generating friendships with complete strangers, which is something that has always really drained me. I think it’s important to be able to be personable even when it’s hard sometimes, and that’s a definite lesson I can take away from India; PMI specifically.

· - I created something out of nothing. I got to use my different talents in work with children, photography, graphic design, language, and organization to start up a brand-new program, the effects of which will surely outlast me. Yes, you know what I’m talking about: the child sponsorship program is officially up and running! There are fifty children enrolled to be sponsored to provide for their education, food, clothing, and extracurricular development from ages two and a half to sixteen. We have our first sponsor registered, and I have three more names lined up to be taken.

· - I have learned that taking the intiative is a fantastic habit, but that forcefully taking the lead is a bad one. No one else will step up to the plate if you do it every time. No one else will grow if you do everything for them. I’m excited to see the turns my life will take as I let myself be led. I’m an independent girl, and I like to know what’s going on. But I’m going to stop worrying about it so much, and try to learn that my role can be fulfilled in sometimes simply waiting.

· - I have grown up. Not to take Shaniah’s line, but man, I feel like a woman! My name means “youthful.” I know I have a youthful spirit; it’s something I quite enjoy about myself, actually. But I hope that I am learning to purge some of my childish actions. I am putting away childish things. I am thinking as one who bears responsibility. I can find my way around India! I can travel internationally by myself! I can initiate my own growth. I can problem-solve. I can make it without holding anyone’s hand, and I can prove it.

· - I have discovered for the first time the excellence of fellowship; of community. Friendships outside The Family are simply not the same. I am only truly refreshed when I spend time with those people who know the truth that I know. How beautiful, to have been created dependent. I appreciate the diversity and unity among believers immensely more now.

How precious this trip is to my heart. I have made friends I will never replace, memories I will never forget, and growth that will not regress.

I got a card signed by everyone in PMI right before I left – wow. What a huge encouragement it was! I couldn’t stop grinning and giggling like a fool in the Delhi airport as I waited to board my flight. I think another thing I’ve found out about myself is that words of affirmation are extremely important to me. I just loved remembering the sweet times and experiences shared with each of these precious people that I love… I think my favorite quote from the card goes to Monty, though… “I can’t believe that Julie is leaving so sad I will never forget you especially your beautiful singing and your Bonny sweet smile.” Haha! I’m going to miss the Hinglish for sure!!!

As for those goals I made at the beginning of the trip… let’s see how I did!

they can be found by clicking HERE

1- i didn't have one tailored, but i bought so many kurtas, it's ridiculous. i count this one as complete.

2- fail. but we've talked about this.

3- check.

4- check. yum.

5- check. so easy.

6- hm, not daily, but i did take 4,000 pictures in India. so, that's more than one-a-day, and i did blog PLENTY. check.

7- fail, but i did say i scratched this one. haha. i will say, though, america has so many more mirrors than India, and i am now confident it's time to hit the gym!!

8- fail. fail fail fail. it was really nice to be able to keep up with people, though, and to post these blog updates on my wall page so it would be easy for people to find. yeah. no excuse for this though. just fail.

9- check, and double check. prakash and me, we tight.

10- check. that's all i gotta say about that.

11- check, it didn't really bother me!

12- check! still alive!

13 - wow, check. this was more true than i even thought it would be.

14- check. two days before leaving.

15- check. guys, i gotta go back.

Just as it wasn’t real to me that I was about to be in India until I saw the Delhi skyline and wedding fireworks, I think it’s not yet real to me that I’m actually gone. What do you mean, I’ve left? You mean my feet won’t be constant stankpiles of dirty callouses? You mean I won’t see cows eating trash on a daily stroll? You mean I have to pay more than three dollars for a pair of shoes? You mean I won’t be suckered into cricket matches to display my profound and hilarious lack of athleticism? You mean there will be Dr. Pepper??? You mean people will arrive on time and I won’t have to wonder at every meal whether I’ll be eating my food or it will be eating me? You mean I’ve really left?

Oh, let me return.

India, you have stolen my heart.

– julie-didi.

Monday, July 5


oh, rain, where have you been all my life?? This morning i woke up for pathshala (we decided to go on our day off just so that i could get more interviews in -- my sincerest thanks to sandeep and andrew for their great sacrifice.) and was sitting in the balcony room reading in Psalms when i heard a dull roar. i thought maybe a truck had turned down our insanely narrow and already double - car - lined street and was coming towards us, but as i looked up i saw not a vehicle, but a wall of water approaching. the heavens dumped their buckets of LIFE on Delhi! It was a beautiful sight, and a wholly welcome one.
how refreshing and renewing water is to these filthy streets and buildings. how vision-changing to see reflections in the road and droplets on the drains.
[speaking of water, after a month and a half of living here i got our water bill... i cringed as Raj began to inform me of the price! I had been waiting for it, unsure of how expensive it would come out to be. You'll be simply shocked. for a month and a half, it came out to two hundred and ten rupees. my friends, that is a little over four dollars. i am little surprised that this is practically the most populous country on earth.]

the raining started last night with a magnificent lightning storm, which was the end of another of my favorite days in Delhi...
it started off with Praise Team practice before church. I've grown away from singing in public, but after having done it for two months consistently now and getting to know these wonderful people, i got very comfortable doing it. I loved being able to sing "None but JC", a song originally performed by Hillsong, and not feel nervous, but instead only worshipful. I sang to conclude the partaking of the Lord's table - our proclamation of His death until He comes - and after the song was done, Peter came to the front to pray and conclude the service. He reminded the congregation that this was my last Sunday with them, and he said "So as she travels home, let us pray for her.... that she will come back!" I was touched. Not that i would have safe travels, not even that i would finish strong in this remaining week, but that i would come back. It's a blessing to know where you're wanted. this passing comment and the prayer for me that followed moved my heart so profoundly. people, let your brothers and sisters know what they're doing right. it means the world.
after church, i was waiting to see what the lunch plans would turn out to be and as i stood in the back, i caught sight of one-month-old Silas, whose birth was announced after my arrival and settling into Hudson Line. I asked his mother if i could hold him, and sat the next half hour in the back of the room just marveling at how wonderfully we are made. His works are wonderful, and my soul knows it, oh, so well. what a precious gift, to hold someone so small, to pray over him and to be reminded of the love and the wonders of God.
After my tiny baby fix, Tiffany, Erica and I headed out to Kamla Nagar to do some last minute shopping, and to grab lunch. when we got back we borrowed Veer-Zaara, a popular 3-and-a-half-hour bollywood chick flick, from Heather and returned to our pinkhouse to watch it. Not sure if i knew this before, but you should be forewarned: Bollywood is NOT true to life in India! Now that i think about it, it's probably comparable to the fact that Hollywood film doesn't really reflect life in America, but this is slightly different i think, due to the fact that Bollywood movies have GOT to be TRYING to be cheezy, over-the-top acting and extra-ridiculously colorful! i'm pretty sure every movie is a musical, and every actor can perform supernatural feats in the plot unattainable by the average human exister.
anyway, we didn't finish before we needed to leave for the 4th of July game night celebration at Peter and Heather's house. We had a great time bonding with the GBC team, eating pizza and playing catch phrase, and telling embarrassing stories. When our dear Indian friend Esther needed to go home, all of the 6 short termers decided to pile in Peter's tiny blue car with her and take her back in the storm which had already started. we rolled down our windows for the rain and cool wind to freely enter, and squeezed in next to each other, laughing and singing and talking about home. We then returned, and Raj stayed in the driver's seat to drive the GBC team back to their hotel. The short termers then snuggled up on the Malakar couches and chatted with Peter and Heather, laughing at our Indian missteps and at Tiffany's inability to keep a secret and at Peter's inability to function without his iphone in his hand. I made chai for everyone (naturally) and brought it in on a tray like the Indians always do, and Peter again said "Wow, well you are welcome in Delhi anytime!" he asked me jokingly, "How long are you prolonging your trip for now?" not gonna lie to you right now, i'm pretty tempted to try! haha :)
We played a couple games of Settlers to finish out the night; Raj won the first game, and after an epic struggle against the boys' pact together not to ever trade resources with me, (thanks a lot!) I won the second. mm, serving the Lord is fun.
how good it is to be with those who love God.
how excellent it is to have your steps numbered for you.
how beautiful to be guided daily by the Truth of the Word.
how assuring to know that trust placed in God is not ill-founded.
how blessed I am to be learning more and more, not as some kind of fleeting mountaintop experience, but day by day by day in a place my heart feels is home.

wow, wow, wow. i love reflecting on this experience. i am continually encouraged and spurred on towards love and good deeds.

Peace from Delhi,
-settlers master, encouraged and surrounded by love.

Sunday, July 4

my name is written on His heart.

aw man, is time ever flying and dragging.
done with today; done with leading another (my last) focal point. it went pretty well, i spoke briefly on peer pressure. i didn't feel very qualified to speak, or quite as prepared as last time, but ultimately with what Peter decided to do with the topic i think it all turned out just great.
This morning at 7:45 we had a chai time to say goodbye to the Master's team. this was.. GREAT. number one, it was the perfect time to take pictures with, say a last goodbye to, and otherwise conclude with the precious people on that californian one-month team. number two, starting with chai makes your day way better than i ever thought! haha, i think i'm going to get up early tomorrow to get some chai supplies since i'm out, and make some before church. man, it really got me up and going! After they headed out, i worked on CSP some more... it's coming along! Then we went to the team study of the word, which was based out of ezekiel 4. It was an interesting passage, but it just made me so thankful for the sacrifice of the Son so that i know all my sin has already been borne. It made me think of the song "Before the throne of God above" so i asked if we could sing it. what a wonderful picture of the grace of the good news. I have a strong and perfect plea with the judge. it's my lawyer, my high priest; it's love. love ever lives and pleads for me.
after the study, Tiffany and Erica and i went to Janpath Central Delhi and had some adventures! a drunk guy continually asked us questions on the metro, from whether we were russian to whether we were friends of india, to asking tiffany her name. after leaving his delightful aroma behind us, we ventured forth to the bartering and tourist attraction found in the marketplace. we bought handmade paper for the CSP brochures, and i got a couple trinkets for different people, and some pants for myself :) Tiffany and Erica got me this beauuutiful chai set which i can hardly begin to describe. it's probably my most india-ish thing i have even, and it's just amazing. it touched me that they bought it for me - i'm serious, i really love it. if you come over and i do some entertaining as chaiwalla, i'll let you use it :)
after that i prepped for focal point and did some more CSP readiness work, and then changed into my little white kurta and walked myself over to the resource center to lead those indians in individualism and maturity! man, how unqualified i am, but how great He is. i'm also unqualified for His grace, am i not? and this very unqualification is what brings me into life with him. it's hard to walk away now that some relationships are beginning to form among the people here. two ladies who come to PMI regularly are Sarika and Vida. i've enjoyed talking to both of them. i guess others will have to finish the work i began with people like these two women, who make my heart long for the belief of the world. i wish i could stay forever and just build my relationships and rapport, but alas, i must trust and go.
well, i fell asleep typing this, so it's really time to sign off here.
with love from Delhi,
the girl with the name that is graven on His hands.

Friday, July 2

In me O Lord can you create a pure heart 'cause i'm afraid that i just might run back to the things i hate...

Wow. One week left until I go.
I’m so excited to share all my stories and experiences with you guys in person, and to show you all I have for you and see you and get you as excited as I am about India!
Today was a really good day. We went to pathshala in the morning after quite some time off because of medical camps going on and sickness of the teachers and translators. I finally got to get started on the sponsorship program with these younger kids, and I’m excited to get them all entered into the system and finally get some of these brochures printed off! It’s gonna be awesome to hold them in my hand, knowing my effort for the last month could change some of their lives. Wow. I hope with all my heart that it will!
After pathshala was the PMI meeting, and the photoshoot for the new brochure picture of the PMI staff. i love these people. they're the heart and soul of my last two months here. and how cute are they?? :)
after that we had an outing to Kamla Nagar (the nearby market area) for lunch. After almost all the Master’s team girls got henna, we ate Chole Bhature again, like when we went with Kelly and Jenny a couple of weeks ago. Man, that stuff is delicious. We also all got legit mango shakes, which for some reason always hits that spot for me. You know how sometimes you’re craving something, and even though you eat and eat you don’t quite feel satisfied? Well, these mango shakes have something in them that, after I’m done, makes me want to sit back with my hands on my belly and my face to the sky; just full, fat and happy, not in need of anything else. I may go back again tomorrow to take tiffany and Erica, and to show them the new KURTA stand I found!! It’s no bargaining, which I like, and they have a row of kurtas for 100 rupees, a row for 150, and a row for 200. (ps. That’s sUPER cHEAP.) wooo! I may grab another one when I go back with them, because I saw a few that could be really cute even as American shirts – I’m bringin this stuff into style, I’m telling you! I love it! now, I know I’ve been saying that about overalls for years now; though I may still be the only one wearing them, I ROCK that hicktown comfort. I guess that may just have to be how it is with Indian modesty. Yayyuh, bring on the eclectic style, cuz I got it all.
Anyway, after all that lunch nonsense, I went to heather’s to upload the pictures for her to get printed and played with prakash and worked some on CSP.
All of that was really great in and of itself, but the best part of the day was the end. Some of the short termers and I had decided to go to Sandeep’s home and meet his family! Tonight he took Andrew and me out there. Right as we left, it started sprinkling. A cover of clouds rolled in and a refreshing breeze blew through Delhi as we traveled by auto to get to his place. It seems a little more rural, though it’s not that far away from where we’ve been working. They have domestic cows everywhere there, for their milk or their labor. Sandeep took us through the four (or was it five?) story house which his family both lives in and rents out to people, all the way to the rooftop add-on room he calls his very own. I know the view was in some ways plain, but it seemed nothing less than breathtaking to me as I stood gawking over the Indian scenery laid out before me. To one side, the highway with the traffic lights beyond a marshy field, to the other, a whole region of a community of people who love each other, and love to stare at white people and maybe even make a stop on the roof where they’re to be found. Yeah. We had visitors. We watched the hazy sun set through the dense clouds as we sat cross-legged on Sandeep’s bare cot and chatted contentedly with his family and some close friends, and simply enjoyed ourselves immensely. Since they own cows and buffalo, Sandeep’s mother (who was much younger than I expected her to be!) was milking the cows when we got there. Guys… I got brave, and I did it – I milked a cow in India!
They said I was pretty good at it, I mean I got the milk out and all. So after pull-and-squeeze-ing the milk out of the buffalo cow, it was immediately made into fresh chai. How simply delightful is that?! we sat and watched the sun set on the village with the neighbor women putting out laundry nearby and children flying kites all throughout the region.
we had a categorically Indian good time, and didn’t leave for probably 3 hours, at which point Sandeep took both of us home on his motorcycle. At once. Sandeep first at the helm, Andrew holding onto him, and me bringing up the rear, clutching Andrew’s backpack and the bar on the back of the motorcycle. Ok seriously. Why do I love motorcycles so much? There’s something about the wind in your hair and having nothing between you and the open road that gets me. Maybe that’s just me being twenty years old, but if it is, I love being twenty.
We finished off the evening with an episode of modern family saved on Andrew’s computer… which is quality television, if I do say so. I always giggle, it’s feel-good tv for me (that and the bachelor, which I cannot wait to watch! Kelly saved the whole season for me!! Yeah America, bring on the Dr. Pepper, Tex-mex, sour gummy worms, chocolate chip cookie dough ice cream and reality tv.) Anyway, after finishing a short episode and making chai for prabin, now I’m feeling nice and tired right at midnight.
I can’t think of a way my day could have gone better.
I want to end with the lyrics to a song that have become new to me here… just one of the many things that I’ve been learning in such a profound way on this trip.

"Before the sun has touched the sky
Colors bursting from Your eyes
Before the flood of the morning light
Before the earth has felt Your heat
Before I stand up to my feet
Before I begin to feel this weak

Satisfy me Lord, oh oh
Satisfy me Lord, oh oh
I'm begging You, to help me see
You're all I want, You're what I need
Oh, satisfy me Lord

When the day is closing in
Like the stars in the night I am falling
Into the pull of the earth and it's affection
In me, oh lord, can you create
A pure heart cuz I'm afraid
That I just might run back to the things I hate

Satisfy me Lord, oh oh
Satisfy me Lord, oh oh
I'm begging You, to help me see
You're all I want, You're what I need
Oh, satisfy me Lord

You're beautiful, so beautiful
You're more than all this world can give.
You're beautiful, more beautiful
Your love is all I need to live"

Father, don't let me run back to the things i hate.

love from delhi,
~satisfied (in the Savior and the mango shakes He created.)